


Confession Time

by dana_katherine_scully



Category: The X-Files
Genre: F/M, First Time, Smut, questions and answers, shared room
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-29
Updated: 2016-08-04
Packaged: 2018-07-27 13:43:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,971
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7620586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dana_katherine_scully/pseuds/dana_katherine_scully
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mulder asks Scully to tell him something about her he doesn't know</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Mulder and Scully belong to CC. Unfortunately.

"Tell me something I don't know about you"

Scully sighed. "Mulder, it's past two a.m."

"Yeah, but you made me turn off the TV and I can't sleep"

"Then count sheep"

"I'm at 76 and still awake..."

Scully turned her head, gazing over at Mulder's dark figure lying on the bed on the other side of the nightstand. He held his hands interlocked behind his head and was staring straight ahead. She fantasized about going back out there and flashing her badge at the clerk who had explained to them a few hours back that there was REALLY only one room left, and that the next town with a hotel was a three hours drive away. She even considered grabbing her blanket and her pillow and sleeping in the car, but her bed was just to damn comfortable. Plus, why couldn't Mulder sleep in the car?

"Come on, Scully... I'll tell you something about myself in return" Mulder pleaded.

"Mulder, I think I know all there is to know about the conundrum called Mulder"

"I wouldn't be so sure about that. Come on, Scully, this will be fun. Plus, I am sure if we had ever made it to one of those team building seminars they kept trying to send us to they would have made us play this game years ago. So we technically owe this to the bureau."

Mulder could put reason behind just about anything. Scully was about to tell him off again, but if she had learned anything in the past hour it was that his turning and tossing wouldn't let her get to sleep anyway. It might just be easier to get this over with.

"Fine. But just one 'confession'. " Scully sighed.

Mulder's eyes widened a little at her choice of words. Scully could tell even though the room was dark save the dim light of the street lamps outside their window. What should she tell him? Certainly nothing that would invite follow-up questions. Something harmless but good enough to satisfy his curiosity. Better something far in the past, something a younger version of herself had done.

"So?"

"Hold on, Mulder, this isn't easy"

"Because you don't have many secrets, or because you don't know which one to pick?"

Scully did not dignify him with an answer.

"Ok. Here it goes. All through high-school I was a blond. I only went back to red because a guy I was into told me he liked redheads."

Mulder turned to face Scully. "That's shocking! The emancipated Dr. Scully changed her looks for a man!"

"Haha, very funny, Mulder."

That hadn't gone half as bad as she had feared it would. She now had two options: She could let it rest and see if he would finally let her sleep, or she could take him up on his promise. On one hand, sleep sounded pretty darn good just about now, but on the other hand, she was curious about what he would be telling her. This was too good of an offer to let pass.

"Mulder?

"Yeah?"

"Your turn."

"Hold on, I am still trying to picture you as a blond..."

Scully only snorted.

"Ok, I got one. Speaking of high-school: When I was in high-school I got sent to the principal's office because I was caught smoking in gym class."

"You didn't happen to be smoking to impress a girl, did you, Mulder?"

"How'd you guess?" Mulder asked feigning shock.

"That was fun, Mulder" Scully finally said with just as much sarcasm in her voice "but I REALLY need to sleep now"

Mulder didn't reply. He seemed to be still thinking about their 'confessions', about which one she was unsure of. 

After a while even the street lights went off, and Scully felt warm sleep washing over her, starting at her toes, slowly crawling up her legs, lingering on her belly, until it finally reached her eyes.

"Can I make a confession, Scully?"

"Hmmmmm..." Scully murmured sleep-drunkenly.

Mulder paused for a minute, before he confessed "the girl I tried to impress was a redhead too. That's what made me think of that story. I've always been into redheads myself."

Scully felt the sleep that a minute ago had been threatening to wash over her retreat.

"Is that so?" Feeling emboldened by the darkness, she couldn't resist. "Have been, Mulder?"

She could practically hear the thoughts being churned over in Mulder's head. 

"Still am."

"Huh."

Mulder, who was still facing her turned back onto his back.  
"To be honest, there's only one redhead that has been occupying my mind for the past few years."

Scully bit her lower lip, immediately hoping Mulder wouldn't notice her reaction. This 'conversation' was quickly entering dangerous territory. Very dangerous territory. She could let this slip, as she always did when things between them got interesting. She was sure that if she let this go now he would never bring this conversation up again. Or she could take him up on his dare. See how far and where he would go with this. 

"Anyone I know?"

"Maybe."

"Tell me about her." She was getting bolder. Part of her wanted to crawl back into her safe shell, but another part of her was (very literally) too tired to keep fighting her impulses.

"She is gorgeous, and I don't think she is even aware of it. She has the most brilliant mind I have ever seen, and I have seen many brilliant people in my days. She is kind and generous and upright down to a tee." Then, in a somewhat lower voice "And she sometimes wears those tight skirts coupled with those fuck-me heels to work, which just about kills me."

Scully inhaled sharply, seriously starting to consider chickening out. This conversation was still harmless enough to ignore it come tomorrow, nobody had actually said anything compromising. But over the last few years Scully had gotten more and more fed up with always being The Ice Queen. She was fed up with sitting on her tongue when he bantered with her freely. 

"Sounds like someone I should be jealous of"

"Jealousy isn't an attribute I would use when describing you."

* * *

End of chapter one


	2. Chapter 2

Scully didn't know what to reply. A thousand thoughts were racing through her mind, but none of them slowed down enough for her to catch. 

This was it. They were standing at the crossroad, and it was up to her to decide which route to take from here. Were they about to cross over from being partners, friends even, to... what exactly? Whereas she had no (oh so no) troubles picturing them in bed together, she couldn't quite imagine them being... a couple. Spending their lives together. They were just too different. Heck, they couldn't even agree on where to stop for lunch on their many road trips, how could they ever make vitally important decisions together?

Sure, she wouldn't mind doing something about this unresolved sexual tension between them (yes, she had noticed it). Not mind at all. Actually, there was less she was more keen on doing right about now (or pretty much any time). She had fantasized about them countless times. Flashes of them together appeared out of nowhere, unbidden more often than not. When he rolled up his sleeves during a meeting with Skinner, when she checked his head after one of his countless accidents, every time he put his hand guidingly on her lower back, heck, even when he wept bundled up in her arms. And in her fantasies they were good together. Oh so good. And the thing was, she was sure they would live up to her expectations. The sex would be good. Mind-blowing-good. But what then? After a while, one of them (her?) would want more, while the other (him?) would want less. One of them would get hurt, whereas the other would feel guilty. She didn't even care which applied to whom, either way was bad. Bad enough to avoid it from happening at all? Probably.

"Mulder..."

"Yes, Scully?"

"I think we should really get some sleep now. I have an early autopsy to conduct tomorrow, and you should start interviewing possible witnesses as early as possible."

Mulder didn't reply. 

Scully felt bad, an ache spreading from her belly to her chest for having once again rebuffed his advancements. But it was for the better. One of them had to keep a cool head, and they both knew that this was her task. She closed her eyes again but was miles (light years actually) away from sleep. Had her decision been right? She was torn between letting him know that his feelings were reciprocated and keeping things safe. She wished there were a way to let him know that she cared about him just as much as he cared about her (probably even more) without any consequences. But she knew Mulder, he never did things half way. With him it was all or nothing. Which was another reason actually not to pursue this any further...

"Scully?"

"Yes?"

"I know you think about me too."

She inhaled sharply. She hadn't expected him to press this. To call her out. She could either deny this and hope he would get the hint to let it drop, or she could tell him the truth. Lying was easier, and much safer. So much safer. But he had mentioned her integrity and she just couldn't get herself to lie about this. There were so many truths evading him, it was heart-breaking to watch. She could at least offer him this one truth. The truth about them.

"Sometimes."

"Sometimes, Scully?"

"Yes, sometimes, Mulder. We spend so much time together, thinking about us being together is unavoidable."

"Is it?"

All of a sudden Mulder was sitting right next to her. He was close. Very close. She could hardly make out his form in the dark, but she could feel his presence. Feel his warmth. Smell his scent. She arched her eyebrows in surprise, and defensively pulled up her legs. 

But Mulder stopped her movements by putting a hand on her knee.

"Do you ever picture me doing this?" he drew small circles with his thumb right above her knee.

"Maybe"

"How about this?" He gently brushed his fingers across her arm. Starting at her wrist, slowly crawling up her arm, higher and higher.

"Yeah" she whispered. Shuddering under his touch.

"Do you ever picture us kissing?" He asked at the exact moment when his fingers reached her shoulder. Her bare shoulders. Of all trips, it of course had to be this trip she thought bringing just a tank-top and shorts to sleep in would be a good idea.

She considered what to reply next. 

But before she could form a reply, his lips were on hers. His kiss was sweet and slow in the beginning, but quickly intensified when he felt her respond. It went from sweet to hot in seconds. So. fucking. hot. If his kiss was a harbinger of what sex with him would be like she was done for. If she didn't stop him now, there would be no turning back. And her mind had provided all reasons as to why this was a bad idea mere minutes ago.

"Mulder, don't". Then, in a whisper "please, don't."

* * *

End of chapter two


	3. Chapter 3

"Scully, every chance we get we run. And I know why we run. I know why YOU run. I know what you are running FROM. But I am so god-damned tired of running. I've tried to suppress my feelings. I've tried to get over you. Hoping that one day I would enter our office and not fall to a thousand pieces when I see you. But it's like I'm taking five steps forward and ten steps back. The more I fight it, the worse it gets. I can't take one more day, one more sleepless night without you. I know you are afraid of our future, and I am afraid too. But I am even more afraid of where we will end up if we don't take this leap. It will tear us apart. It will tear ME apart."

"Mulder, please stop."

"No, Scully, no, I will not stop. This is it, Scully. This is me, baring my soul to you. If there is one thing I am sure of, it is my feelings for you. And I know the feelings are mutual. I see you looking at me, Scully. I feel your eyes on me, watching my every move when you think I don't notice. But I DO notice."

"Mulder..."

"I am not blind, Scully. And if I am not mistaken, your feelings for me are not as innocent as you'd like to make them out to be. Don't think I don't hear my name escape your lips when you sleep."

Scully gasped.

"And I know the tone in your voice when you say my name. It's the sound of longing. Of desire. So don't try to tell me you don't reciprocate my feelings. Don't try to tell me you don't fantasize about us in your dreams."

"Mulder, we can't."

"We cant what?"

"We can't let this happen. There will be no happy end for us."

"You can't honestly believe that! Tell me together we wouldn't be at our happiest. Tell me together we wouldn't be mind-blowing. I know I would give it my all. And I am fairly certain so would you."

"That's exactly the problem Mulder! If I give into this, into us, it will be with all my soul. Yes, things will probably be great in the beginning, but sooner or later things will change. I don't know how or why or when it will happen, but it WILL happen. You might find someone else, or you might just have had enough of 'us'. And if you leave me, it will break me. I will never be the same without you, having experienced who I can be WITH you. We would have to split, and I don't just mean as lovers. We would have to split as partners, as friends. And that is not a risk I am willing to take."

"I know I can't promise you a happy ever after. To be honest, I hardly ever seem to be able to catch a happy present. But all the wrongdoings, all the injustice, all the evil in this world, they all seem worth fighting when you're with me. BECAUSE you're with me. I would have given up long ago without you. I would have spiralled downward in self pity, further and further, until I wouldn't have been able to tell up from down. But YOU kept me from falling. You saved me, Scully. You always made me see the right way, chose the right path, and I don't think I can continue on without you. I NEED you, Scully. And I need ALL of you!"

A tear threatened to escape Scully's averted eyes. But she managed to hold it back.

"Mulder, I am sorry, but we just can't do this." 

"Scully, please!"

The tear fell after all. 

But Mulder's thumb was right there, there to catch it before it had even reached her cheekbone. He let his thumb linger, warm and soft against her cool face, and after a minute Scully's gaze returned to Mulder. And all the love, all the vulnerability, all the rawness she saw in his eyes made her heart constrict. Yes, she was afraid of them being together. Was afraid of getting hurt. But she realized that by rejecting him she probably hurt him just as much as she was afraid of getting hurt. And Mulder had already experienced so much pain. So much more than any human soul should ever experience. She just couldn't bare being another reason he hurt.

Scully hesitantly lifted her hand and put her thumb on Mulder's upper lip. She traced his Cupid's bow in one slow motion, feeling his hot breath on her hand. Mulder held her gaze steadily as she slightly leaned in, leaned in for a kiss that would change her world. A kiss that would change both of their worlds.

* * *

End of chapter three


	4. Chapter 4

Scully leaned in, further and further, until she could almost hear Mulder's heart beat. Mulder was still holding her gaze steadily, but she felt his body responding to her, could see his breath quickening. At the last moment Scully closed her eyes, plunging into the kiss as if it were cold water. But it wasn't. It was anything but cold. It was hot, and raw, so full of emotions it took Scully's breath away. There was so much longing, such desperation in Mulder's kiss, she almost got scared and pulled back. She hadn't expected the kiss to be so intense. In her dreams, their first 'real' kiss had always started out somewhat like their New Year's kiss, soft and shy. However Mulder was anything but shy in his kiss. On the contrary.

Mulder moved his hand away from Scully's cheek, placed it on the back of her head, and pulled her further into the kiss. His kiss became even more intense, and Scully could feel her desire increase tenfold. As if her body had her own will, her hands were all of a sudden all over him, pulling on his shirt in desperation. She had to feel more of him, so much more. 

Mulder pulled back and swiftly pulled his shirt over his head. He then moved in to remove Scully's top as well, but Scully was faster than him, and pushed him back until he was lying flat against the bed. In an instant she was on top of him, straddling him tightly. Mulder was taken off guard, and it took him a minute to recompose himself. He tried again to reach for Scully's top, but Scully stopped his advances by pushing him back down with one hand, before she slowly, very slowly lifted her shirt over her head herself. At her sight Mulder gasped. He actually gasped, and a smirk appeared on Scully's lips. She finally let him touch her. But where Mulder had been bold and dominant before, he was now the complete opposite. Soft and demure, as if touching her was a sacrilege. If he believed in sacrileges. 

Scully let him explore her. She watched how he observed his hands moving over her, his eyes wide in amazement, as if he still couldn't believe he was actually touching her. She could practically see him storing every last detail of her in his photographic memory, bury it deep down, making sure he would never forget even the smallest detail. She watched him until his thumb hesitantly reached her nipple, whereupon her head fell back and her eyes shut. She felt the desire wander further down to a very specific spot, and would have instantaneously ravaged Mulder if she hadn't wanted to draw this out as long as possible. 

Having explored her breasts long enough, Mulder lay one hand flat against her sternum, before slowly moving his fingers down in a straight line, down towards her belly, until he reached the waistband of her panties. Scully raised her head back up, and halted for an instant, before she went in for another kiss. This time it was her who was greedy for more, oh so much more. She could feel a smile form on Mulder's lips as he kissed her back. His hand moved lower and lower, and his smile grew wider and wider, until he reached her most sensitive area, upon which she broke their kiss by gasping. But in an instant her lips were on his again, ravenous, pulling on his lower lip with her teeth, exploring his hot mouth with her tongue. Mulder had found her most sensitive spot with his thumb, and slowly started to draw circles. Scully grasped his head with both hands and pulled on his hair as if to keep herself from falling. 

It only took a few minutes until Scully knew she wouldn't last much longer. She firmly grabbed his wrist and pushed his hand away, before she moved on to pull away his shorts. She lost no time losing her panties too, before she placed herself over him and halted. Mulder had placed his hands flat against the bed on either side of his body, and lay himself completely at her mercy. He knew that it had to be her initiation, that he had to let her make this final step. So he waited patiently. 

Having removed the last physical boundary, Scully was straddling him again. She paused and bit her lower lip, enjoying the calm before the storm, her eyes dark with lust. 

"You're breathtaking, do you know that? "

Scully blushed. They were about to have sex, for crying out loud, and she blushed because he called her beautiful. But she couldn't help it. 

Instead of replying, she lowered herself onto him. Slowly, so excruciatingly slowly, until she felt his presence at her entrance. She halted, and felt him twitch, which brought another smirk onto her lips. With one smooth moment she lowered herself further, until Mulder started to fill her, and she would have stayed like this until the end of time, had she been able to suppress her desire to completely bury him inside of her, to finally feel him all the way. And once inside he felt good. So fucking good. She drew small circles while rhythmically rocking her hips, Mulder watching her intensely all the while. How could he be so god-damned composed? Was he not almost torn up by desire like her? She almost couldn't control herself, wanted to fuck him until she didn't know up from down, but he, he just watched her calmly, as if she wasn't trying to fuck him into oblivion.

"Mulder?"

"Yeah?"

"Fuck me, for the love of God."

"If I let go, I won't be able to hold back."

"Then don't"

Before she could realize what was happening, Mulder had reversed their positions, and it was her lying on her back while he thrust into her. And his force almost overwhelmed her. He felt so good, so unbelievably good, that she almost came immediately. She was close, so close, so fucking close. 

"Mulder, please..."

Mulder sensed she was close and paused to let her compose herself. He went in for another kiss, and this time their desire was in perfect unison. When Scully felt the orgasm that had threatened to overcome her retreat, she started moving her hips again, this time in teasingly small motions. Mulder groaned but kept still, letting her tease him. She could feel his willpower being tested, feel him giving everything to hold back, to not thrust into her, sending them both into oblivion.

"Make me come, Mulder"

Her words broke him free, and he picked up where he left of, thrusting so hard into her she almost couldn't breathe. And Mulder did make her come, he made her come so hard he had her screaming "Oh GOD, Mulder..."

Mulder tried to hold back, to draw this out a little longer, but it was a battle lost. Hearing Scully, for God's sake SCULLY, say his name like that, he couldn't restrain himself if his life depended on it. He followed Scully into the abyss, moaning her name over and over again, until he collapsed on top of her.

Mulder gave her a loving kiss before he rolled off her. They both lied there for a while, until she finally spoke.

"I love you, you know that, Scully, right?"

"I do"

She placidly stretched her legs before stating "This was just as breath-taking as I've always imagined it would be like."

"So you finally admit having fantasized about us?"

"Shut up, Mulder, and come here!"

* * *

The End.


End file.
